And now, let’s play “Ask a Stupid Question”! Here’s our candidate, Chelsie the Cun-I mean Cheetah!

 

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What’s the most entertaining non-sentient creature for you to hunt?

That’d have to be this little squirrel that had eating some of the special mushrooms over that way. Difficult, but entertaining. And tasty.

Do you ever get those little eye boogers? Doesn’t that stain your fur?

There’s less fur directly around my eyes than on the rest of my face. So no. The few times I do get them, they tend to get stuck on my eyelashes.

Why is there a direct correlation between people who love the feeling of taking a shit and people who like anal sex?

There is? Wow. I guess I don’t enjoy pooping enough.

What’s your favorite weather?

Hmmm. I’d have to go with sunny, but not too warm. It’s pretty nice to lie around outside and just bask.

Do you live a healthy life style?

I try. It’s a tough job, being a huntress.

Are you physically fit?

Does this belly look unfit to you?

Do you like bacon?

Little man, I like ALL sorts of meat and meat byproducts ;)

What is your most disliked food?

Broccoli. It’s disgusting.

What is your favorite color?

Golden yellow, oooooooobviously.

Do you love your parents?

I did. It was pretty hard on me when they died.

Were you beaten as a child?

Only to make me stronger >:3

Were you beaten as an adult?

Yeah… sometimes the prey fights back and wins, heh.

Do you beat your children?

If I had any, I wouldn’t.

Do you drink alcohol?

I do if I can get it, but it’s not like I go out of my way for it. Girl’s gotta prioritize, y'know?

Do you drink milk?

Oh wow. Gotta love milk.

What’s you favorite ice cream?

What’s ice cream?

What would you like to dress up for Halloween?

I don’t dress up. I just sit around the lair and give… heh… special treats. ;)

Who let the dogs out?

This one adventurer I met once brought dogs. He did “let them out”, so to speak. Gold may be soft and mallable, but it did nicely to protect me.

Are you good at math?

… Not very good at all. It’s not exactly a skill I’ve had much of a need for, y'know? So just some basic addition and subtraction… I get by.

What’s your favorite subject?

World History. I’ve a few books on that out in the back.

What’s your job?

I’m a huntress. Didn’t I say so before?

Do you have siblings?

I used to. I don’t know what happened to them.

Chelsie, what is your personal view about your chest? Do they get in the way while hunting prey?

They’re nice and big, the way I’d prefer them. But to be honest, they don’t really bother me very much in the hunt.

Have you ever considered looking for a friend, rather than just use a person for your satisfaction?

I do have friends. They live in nearby villages and make great conversation.

What kind of living quarters do you prefer? Do you like larger areas or want to keep your things close by?

I think my current hideout is pretty much just right. It’s roomy, but not exactly “huge”.

Where did you get this necklace?

From my mother when I was just a little cub. It’s a family heirloom.

What do you prefer to eat, besides meat?

…You lost me.

What were your parents like, if you ever got to see them long enough?

My father was a proud, violent man, but he was never violent to me or the rest of the clan. My mother was… not very different, really. Just with more displays of love and affection towards immediate family. I’m sure my father loved us too, he just didn’t show it as much. He did have a reputation to uphold, after all.

What would you do if you actually came to meeting a love interest?

To be entirely honest, I don’t actually know what I’d do.

Being a unique looking person, how do they usually react when you try to talk with them?

Unique? Huh. I guess that’s one way to look at things. Anyway, they usually stand there shaking in confused fear. Must be my lovely smile.

How’d you react if someone invited you over to their house?

Well, if it’s a nice someone with a… reasonably nice house, I’m sure we could come to some kind of agreement?

If you would ever look for an actual love interest, would you prefer an attractive type? Or rather the more intelligent one?

I mean, I like to think I’m as intelligent as I am attractive ;)

Do you like bathing in the sun at times?

I do, actually. I have a lounging spot up on the roof. It hardly ever rains here, after all.

What if you met someone that has similar issues to yours?

I have issues?

And that’s all for today folks. Should we get more questions, make sure to catch the next episode of “Ask a Stupid Question!”